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My dear, beloved bicycle thief

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛My dear, beloved bicycle thief

You've stolen 12 of my bikes. Why don't you try something new?
(By Ezat Mossalanejad)


MY DEAR, beloved bicycle thief. I do hope that this will reach you at your best possible condition of health.

One recent evening, after finishing work at 7:30, I went down with lots of hope of riding my bike home; it was missing. I searched the whole neighbourhood desperately. I was hoping that for emergency purposes you had used and abandoned it somewhere. So I went back and forth in the spot where I had locked my bike in the hope that, out of pity, you would put it back.

Alas, you had stolen my bike again.

I have been riding bicycles for the last half century; 25 years in Iran, 8 years in Poona (India), 5 years in Montreal and 12 years in Toronto. I always properly lock my bikes and nobody has stolen my bikes anywhere. Except in Toronto, where, during the last 12 years, I have lost 12 bikes.

Wednesday, during my four-kilometre walk from home to work, I continued eating watermelon seeds and thinking of you, my dear bicycle thief.

You know better than I about the ever-increasing prices and the skyrocketing rents. Therefore, it will be difficult, if not impossible, for a working person like me to buy a new bike.

Now that you have taken away my transport, I will have to continue walking for months to come. Please do not feel bad if, in the course of these long walks, I swear at you.

Especially when it turns cold.

In an attempt to discourage you from stealing, I stopped riding brand new bikes and chose to buy and ride dilapidated ones.

My friend Bruce bought me a very old rusted bike from a garage sale by paying $1.50. Thank you for leaving this bike alone. But I could only ride it for two months before the chain broke in the middle of the road. It left me helpless and caused much laughter from passers-by.

I went to Bruce again. He took me in his car and we went to almost all the garage sales in the city. In the course of two weekends we purchased an octogenarian bike for $5. I could ride it for five weeks before it stopped forever in the middle of the road.

I was left with no choice but to borrow my son's bike. I locked the front part to the bars of the bicycle rack downstairs.

In the afternoon, a client casually mentioned about seeing a bike downstairs without a back tire. It was my son's bike. Tell me please: What was the use of a back tire to you?

Do you know what happened to me that night? I pleaded my innocence by swearing to 1,000 goddesses and gods on Earth and the heavens, but my 11-year-old son did not believe me. He insisted that I had intentionally inflicted an irreparable harm upon him to discourage him from riding bicycles.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I was hoping you would think I was a woman and spare my bike

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


After this, I did some extra work, saved money and bought a good second-hand ladies' bike. I had been told that, in multicultural Toronto, even the bicycle thieves respect women and their fundamental rights. I was hoping that you would think I was a woman and spare my bike.

I took an additional precaution and purchased the strongest locks in the whole world. It was difficult even for me to unlock it.

How did you do that, my dear bicycle thief, without even having a proper key? Is it not better for you, my friend, to quit your job as a petty thief and become a wonderful locksmith, so badly needed in Toronto?

You have so far stolen 12 bikes from me. I have never reported to police and will never do it in future.

Let me honestly confess to you that it is not out of my feeling for you. It is due to the facts of life in this big metropolitan city. Due to various reasons, the rate of crimes has increased and will continue to do so. This has made these dedicated police officers so busy dealing with critical cases that they have no time for petty offences. Besides, hundreds of bikes are stolen in Toronto every day and bikes do not have licence plates. That is why I am appealing directly to you.

Since my bike was stolen, I have been staring at all cyclists to see if they are riding my bike. Do you understand what you have done to me? You have turned an optimistic good citizen of Toronto into a suspicious pessimist. Please, if possible, find a positive alternative to stealing poor people's bikes.

You have stolen so many bikes from me that I have become used to it. This time I have not been as stressed as before. In a way, I am turning apathetic to the whole issue.

I urgently and respectfully plead to you, my dear bicycle thief, to return my bike immediately. I will borrow money and pay you a reward five times more than the price of my bike.

It was not an ordinary bike to me. It was part of my family. Please do not separate intimate friends.

I work with the Canadian Centre for Victims of Torture, 194 Jarvis St.

You may leave the bike near the bicycle rack, where I had originally left it.

Thank you for your consideration and I am enthusiastically looking forward to hearing from you.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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Replies, comments and Discussions:

  • 枫下家园 / 生活杂事 / 刚才出去邮信的工夫,放在院中的自行车被人拿走.真感觉有些奇怪.当时替房东看房的一家人和他们的朋友都在家里,他们后院房门是开着的,怎么偏看上我的就自行车呢?
    • Sorry to hear that. Which area are you living? Sigh.
      • north york.
        • 老天, 那不是好区吗? 也这样
          • north york好像也从东到西挺大一片儿的。而且,就算住在豪宅区边儿上,也不能保证什么呀。
            • 以前住在EAST YORK的时候自行车就这么丢了, 当时都不敢相信, 朋友说他在NORTH YORK住, 就特好, 所以悼念自行车的时候就想, 要是在NORTH YORK。。。
            • 我住在YOUNG------BAYVIEW,SHEPPARD-----FINCH,中间.
          • 周围都是有钱人家,我们的后院门晚上几乎天天都是开着的,车就锁在门口.谁想到大白天(家里还有很多人)却丢啦.
            • 哪个小偷也是太逊了, 一个自行车就成了贼。 别着急, 失财免灾
              • 谢谢!我住在YOUNG/SHEPPARD.自从买了自行车就骑过一回(其实挺喜欢的),可能那个人比我更需要它吧------他可是开车才能拿走的呀. 可是他(她)应该管我要才对呀.(说明白些,就是怀疑是被XXXXXXXX拿的).
                • xxxxxx是谁啊? 这么想就对了, 不会因为一个自行车就穷死,他也不会因为多了一个就富了
                  • 是谁网上不便说呀.
                    • 都有怀疑对象拉? 别瞎猜, 一定是谁随手拿走了
                      • 呵呵就算送人啦,省得搬家还得找个大车.
    • 和我的车一样,被人捡走了。
      • sorry to hear that too! 也是到你家去拾的吗?也是在周末YARD SALE 时间开车去的?
        • 我是两辆车锁一起,偷儿把锁给”捡“了,两辆车一起被“捡”走了。
        • 见#667223
    • 听说这里偷车现象很严重,觉得很奇怪!这里人们生活质量不是都挺高的么?没来之前还听人说这里的车都不用锁呢!现在,嘿!朋友警告我们说,新车,至少要加两把锁!
    • 为你感到难过。从中可知:任何地方,都有无耻之徒,你要看好你自己的东西。骗子、小偷你们谁敢说在Rolia上就没有呢?可能那个小偷会说:我是把你的车去让见见世面,以后我可以帮你买个好价钱。哈哈!
      • 您的联想能力真是非常非常的丰富!!!!
        • 多对失主表示一下同情吧!对我这个陌生人你不必用“您”,留着用在你长辈的身上吧!哈哈!!
        • 感觉这个冷X对许多问题的看法都有与众不同, 有个性!!
          • 承蒙乃XXXX夸奖,笑纳!这Rolia上有些人灌水灌的变成灌迷混汤了,人云亦云,弄的坛子,毫无特色!哈哈!!
            • 有道理,喜欢百家争鸣。
              • Thank you for your understanding. Thank you very much!
    • Take it easy. Check Toronto Star August 12 A17, the article: My dear, beloved bicycle thief. The author lost 12 bicycles in Toronto within 12 years!
      • My dear, beloved bicycle thief
        本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛My dear, beloved bicycle thief

        You've stolen 12 of my bikes. Why don't you try something new?
        (By Ezat Mossalanejad)


        MY DEAR, beloved bicycle thief. I do hope that this will reach you at your best possible condition of health.

        One recent evening, after finishing work at 7:30, I went down with lots of hope of riding my bike home; it was missing. I searched the whole neighbourhood desperately. I was hoping that for emergency purposes you had used and abandoned it somewhere. So I went back and forth in the spot where I had locked my bike in the hope that, out of pity, you would put it back.

        Alas, you had stolen my bike again.

        I have been riding bicycles for the last half century; 25 years in Iran, 8 years in Poona (India), 5 years in Montreal and 12 years in Toronto. I always properly lock my bikes and nobody has stolen my bikes anywhere. Except in Toronto, where, during the last 12 years, I have lost 12 bikes.

        Wednesday, during my four-kilometre walk from home to work, I continued eating watermelon seeds and thinking of you, my dear bicycle thief.

        You know better than I about the ever-increasing prices and the skyrocketing rents. Therefore, it will be difficult, if not impossible, for a working person like me to buy a new bike.

        Now that you have taken away my transport, I will have to continue walking for months to come. Please do not feel bad if, in the course of these long walks, I swear at you.

        Especially when it turns cold.

        In an attempt to discourage you from stealing, I stopped riding brand new bikes and chose to buy and ride dilapidated ones.

        My friend Bruce bought me a very old rusted bike from a garage sale by paying $1.50. Thank you for leaving this bike alone. But I could only ride it for two months before the chain broke in the middle of the road. It left me helpless and caused much laughter from passers-by.

        I went to Bruce again. He took me in his car and we went to almost all the garage sales in the city. In the course of two weekends we purchased an octogenarian bike for $5. I could ride it for five weeks before it stopped forever in the middle of the road.

        I was left with no choice but to borrow my son's bike. I locked the front part to the bars of the bicycle rack downstairs.

        In the afternoon, a client casually mentioned about seeing a bike downstairs without a back tire. It was my son's bike. Tell me please: What was the use of a back tire to you?

        Do you know what happened to me that night? I pleaded my innocence by swearing to 1,000 goddesses and gods on Earth and the heavens, but my 11-year-old son did not believe me. He insisted that I had intentionally inflicted an irreparable harm upon him to discourage him from riding bicycles.


        --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
        I was hoping you would think I was a woman and spare my bike

        --------------------------------------------------------------------------------


        After this, I did some extra work, saved money and bought a good second-hand ladies' bike. I had been told that, in multicultural Toronto, even the bicycle thieves respect women and their fundamental rights. I was hoping that you would think I was a woman and spare my bike.

        I took an additional precaution and purchased the strongest locks in the whole world. It was difficult even for me to unlock it.

        How did you do that, my dear bicycle thief, without even having a proper key? Is it not better for you, my friend, to quit your job as a petty thief and become a wonderful locksmith, so badly needed in Toronto?

        You have so far stolen 12 bikes from me. I have never reported to police and will never do it in future.

        Let me honestly confess to you that it is not out of my feeling for you. It is due to the facts of life in this big metropolitan city. Due to various reasons, the rate of crimes has increased and will continue to do so. This has made these dedicated police officers so busy dealing with critical cases that they have no time for petty offences. Besides, hundreds of bikes are stolen in Toronto every day and bikes do not have licence plates. That is why I am appealing directly to you.

        Since my bike was stolen, I have been staring at all cyclists to see if they are riding my bike. Do you understand what you have done to me? You have turned an optimistic good citizen of Toronto into a suspicious pessimist. Please, if possible, find a positive alternative to stealing poor people's bikes.

        You have stolen so many bikes from me that I have become used to it. This time I have not been as stressed as before. In a way, I am turning apathetic to the whole issue.

        I urgently and respectfully plead to you, my dear bicycle thief, to return my bike immediately. I will borrow money and pay you a reward five times more than the price of my bike.

        It was not an ordinary bike to me. It was part of my family. Please do not separate intimate friends.

        I work with the Canadian Centre for Victims of Torture, 194 Jarvis St.

        You may leave the bike near the bicycle rack, where I had originally left it.

        Thank you for your consideration and I am enthusiastically looking forward to hearing from you.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
        • 真难得还有这么好脾气的人.
          • 我认识一个,嘿嘿。
    • 下次在车上挂个sale 的车牌,保证没人偷
      • 那是不是还得留一个装钱的信封呀.
        • 还要贴上邮票,写上回邮地址... :)
    • 根据已经抓的全是东欧移民交待,自行车好偷,卖给中国新移民很好卖 来钱快,看来问题在新移民太喜欢买旧自行车了。
      • One person sale bicycle every weekends at Parkway Forest Dr./Forest Manor. Maybe he ...